campaign 2015 copy updates

app/helpers/campaigns_helper.rb

@@ -1,2 +1,9 @@
 module CampaignsHelper
+  def emote_md(text)
+    text = text.
+      gsub(/:\)/, image_tag('emoticons/smiley.gif')).
+      gsub(/:D/, image_tag('emoticons/grin.gif')).
+      gsub(/:P/, image_tag('emoticons/tongue.gif'))
+    md text
+  end
 end

app/views/campaigns/show.html.haml

@@ -26,7 +26,7 @@
       = text_field_tag 'donation[amount]', '10.00'
     %button{:type => 'submit'} Donate now!
 
-#description= md @campaign.description
+#description= emote_md @campaign.description
 
 - if @donations.present?
   %h2 Thanks to our lovely donors!
@@ -62,8 +62,8 @@
 
     But, even though PayPal isn't integrated into the site, we'll still gladly
     accept individual donations through PayPal if you'd prefer.
-    #{mail_to 'webmaster@openneo.net', "Drop us an email and we'll figure it
-    out."} Thanks!
+    #{mail_to 'webmaster@openneo.net', "Drop us an email and we'll talk
+    details."} Thanks!
 
   %h2 Some notes on featured outfits
   :markdown
@@ -76,7 +76,7 @@
     However, there are a few important bits of legal whatnot to keep in mind.
     (Mostly, it's the list of things that we expect to do but in no legally
     binding way promise to do. Just in case
-    <img src="#{camo_image_url 'http://images.neopets.com/neoboards/smilies/tongue.gif'}" />)
+    #{image_tag 'emoticons/tongue.gif'}
 
     Featuring your outfit is a thank-you gift that we like to give our donors;
     it is *not* a purchased service. We make no guarantee that we'll post your
@@ -85,28 +85,30 @@
     site for as long as the site lives, and in rotation on the homepage until
     some other site event or feature needs the space.)
 
-    We reserve the right to refuse to post any outfit for any reason, and we
-    reserve the right to remove any previously posted outfit for any reason.
-    Same goes for the name attached to your donation.
+    We reserve the right to refuse to post any content for any reason, and we
+    reserve the right to remove any previously posted content at any time for
+    any reason. If we don't like the outfit's name, the outfit's appearance,
+    or the name on your donation, or anything else, then we don't have to
+    publish it, and we won't necessarily refund you—especially if the content
+    seems malicious.
     (That said, we intend to allow most any name and outfit that are
     appropriate for Neopians of all ages.)
 
-    If you change your mind about donating, no worries: we'll refund any
-    good-faith donation within 60 days of the day you donated.
-    (For example, changing your mind and requesting a refund *is* acting in
-    good faith, and we'd love to help you out.
-    Posting an obscene outfit then requesting a refund once we take it down is
-    *not* acting in good faith, and we don't want our refund policy to
-    encourage that behavior
-    <img src="#{camo_image_url 'http://images.neopets.com/neoboards/smilies/tongue.gif'}" />
-    We determine "good faith" at our sole discretion—not limited to those
+    If you change your mind about donating, no worries: you can request a
+    refund within 60 days of donating, and, so long as you're acting in good
+    faith, we'll refund the entire donation.
+    (For example, if you realize you can't afford to donate, or legit just
+    change your mind, then we'd love to help you out :)
+    But we don't want people posting obscene outfits and expecting refunds once
+    we take them down, so we need a refund policy that lets us reject those
+    requests #{image_tag 'emoticons/tongue.gif'}
+    So, we determine "good faith" at our sole discretion—not limited to those
     examples—but we're generally pretty understanding.)
 
     **TL;DR: We love to help and acknowledge our good-faith donors,
     but reserve the right not to do those things,
     in order to better handle bad-faith donors and unexpected circumstances.**
-    Huh. That was way simpler.
-    Maybe I should've just written that in the first place.
+    That's all #{image_tag 'emoticons/smiley.gif'}
 
 - content_for :javascripts do
   = javascript_include_tag 'https://checkout.stripe.com/checkout.js',

app/views/donation_mailer/thank_you_email.html.erb

@@ -1,19 +1,9 @@
 <p>
-  Hello, hello! I'm Matchu, loving father of Dress to Impress.
+  Hi, friend! I'm Matchu, that guy who made Dress to Impress :)
 </p>
 
 <p>
-  I just wanted to let you know how much your help means to me.
-  I built the site mostly for fun, and never really expected it to catch on,
-  but here we are, years later, and the site is entirely community-driven, from
-  our modeling data to our hosting costs.
-  Thanks so much for being a part of that community—the whole thing blows my
-  mind, and I feel honored to be a part of this big thing that is Dress to
-  Impress :)
-</p>
-
-<p>
-  Before I forget, let's get to receipt business.
+  So, let's do the business first:
   You donated
   <strong><%= number_to_currency @donation.amount / 100.0 %></strong>
   (thanks again, by the way!),
@@ -22,24 +12,26 @@
 </p>
 
 <p>
-  Anyway. I hope you enjoy our little thank-you gift (you <em>do</em> have some
-  beautiful outfits for me to show off, right?), and that Dress to Impress
-  continues to bring you joy :)
+  Really, though, my favorite part of these emails is that it gives me a chance
+  to hear from some of our most excited users :D
+  What do you love about Dress to Impress? What parts aren't so great?
+  Any issues I can help you with while we're here?
+  What does Dress to Impress need to do long-term to continue to be a valuable
+  resource for years to come?
 </p>
 
 <p>
-  Oh! And, if you ever have anything to say to me, <em>please</em> let me know
-  at <%= mail_to 'matchu@openneo.net' %>. I'm looking forward to any and all
-  questions, comments, concerns, insults, treasure maps, love letters, memes,
-  or limericks you send my way :D
+  Hit Reply and let me know—or we can just talk
+  about how pumped we are for the next season of Doctor Who :o
+  Up to you :)
 </p>
 
 <p>
-  Thanks again for your help! DTI &lt;3s you.<br />
-  —Matchu
+  Thanks again for your help! Serving this community is an honor and a pleasure.<br />
+  —<i>Matchu</i>
 </p>
 
 <p>
   P.S. Seriously. Reply to this email and tell me something.
-  It'll make my day :D
+  It always makes my day :D
 </p>